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10 Positive Prophecies for the 2010 Mets

Since the Mets won on Opening Day, let's ride this virtuous wave until we face plant into the sand, lose our swim trunks, and inevitably reveal to the world our cold, cruel, pasty white shrinkage that is the 2010 Mets team.

One thing Mets fans love to do is overreact to every possible thing the organization does. For example, the Mets sign Manny Acosta off waivers to a minor league contract and "WHAT THE HELL, this guy is a COMPLETE and UTTER BUM! Someone needs to tell OMAR to clean out his office and hit the ROAD immediately!"

But on the other side of the coin, when the Mets win a few games and "YA GOTTA BELIEVE! If we can win 7 out of the next 10 on this road trip then we are ONLY 6 Games out of the Wild Card race!"

This is why I am a Mets fan.

What would happen if the Mets luck was reversed? If CERN's Large Hadron Collider accidentally created a wormhole that forced the entire Solar System to collapse onto itself? And when we came out of the other side of the wormhole, we were in a parallel universe where everything was exactly identical to the original universe with the only exceptions being that the Mets had a serendipitous future and that I was worlds first astrophysicist ninja UFC Champion?

Einstein's Theory of Relativity says this is possible.

Here are 10 Positive Prophecies for the 2010 Mets.

1) Carlos Beltran will play 120 games. If he comes back on the middle of May like scheduled and takes off only one day a month for the rest of the season, then we'll have the Puerto Rican prowler back in center field and switch hitting in the middle of what will be a potent lineup

2) David Wright will hit 35 home runs. David's added more beef this off season than Bengie Molina at a make your own taco stand. He has proved that he has the prodigious pop in the past and with a few minor changes to his approach at the plate, he'll show that last season was a fluke

3) Johan Santana will throw a no hitter at CitiField. This pitching accomplishment has eluded every Mets pitcher that's ever donned Blue and Orange. Johan will do this in August in a game that no one expects him to and the reason why will be because not one spectator will utter the words "no" or "hitter" in the 9 inning span.

4) Jerry Manuel will make coherent decisions. Even if Bobby Cox and Bobby Valentine had a baby named Bobby Coxentine, he wouldn't have led the 2009 Mets to a winning record. The Jerry Manuel that won the job in 2008 will once again reappear.

5) NYsportsGUY will get invited back to the Press Row. I was fortuitous enough to get invited to interview the Mets team last summer on behalf of MetsmerizedOnline and NYsportSpace.com. It was great to speak to the players and sit in the Press Box to watch the game. So what I sat in Jay Horowitz seat, It's not like HIS NAME WAS on it or anything.

6) Jose Reyes will win a Gold Glove. The prospectus of my man Jose Reyes playing in 150 games gives Mets fans confidence that watching the team this year will be delightful. He always possessed the talent to be a top notch defensive SS. Focus and dedication will overcome over-zealousness in 2010.

7) Jenrry Mejia will build a cult following. Think Joba Fever times 10. Think a group of Long Islanders dressed up as creaky old men in the outfield stands that hold signs that say "The Jenry-atrics". Think of "wild thing" being played as he runs out onto the field from the bullpen.

8) Gary Cohen will win a New York Sports Emmy Award. The soothing baritone sounds that emits from my TV screen on a Sunday afternoon make it difficult not to lull into a hungover induced trance. The only thing that stops me is that it's that exact sound of Gary's voice that makes it enjoyable and educational to listen to a Mets game, even if they are losing.

9) Oliver Perez will accumulate over 190 Strikeouts. Considering that he once threw for a whopping 239 K's in 2004, it isn't totally inconceivable that Ollie could pull together a healthy season of 200 innings and 190 K's. Especially if we are indeed in a parallel universe.

10) The Mets will win the National League East.
What what WHAT! Yeah I just went there! Say everyone on the Mets pulls through on the first 9 things on this list and we actually make the playoffs. Is it really that unlikely?

HA! Yeah right!

That's what you just said in your head.

But is it really that unlikely?

Answer: Yes. Oh well.

Even if just 2 measly things happen on this list of positive prophecies, I will at least be somewhat entertained throughout this season and so will you.

Thanks for reading. I hope I didn't freak you out with my weirdness. If not, Follow Me on Twitter or check out other Mets articles on NYSS

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Tags: manual, mets, perez, predictions, prophecies, reyes, wouldn't it be a multiverse actually, wright

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