NYSS - An Abortion of New York Sports Journalism
2010 Mets Season Prediction & Timeline
I wish i could take responsibility for this Pulitzer Prize of Journalism. It's so fantastic that I will post this. As a Lifelong Yankee fan, I don't hate the Mets. I feel bad for them. I think its the colors. (Knicks, Islanders, Mets) You know something is a sad state of affairs when the Islanders have the most titles of any of those teams. Anyhow thought you'd all get a laugh at this post from the NYTimes comments section.
The Mets. A preview of 2010
March 23 Reyes OKed to play by Mets' Crack Medical Team (MCMT) after bout with hyperactive thyroid.
March 31 Oliver Perez remanded to mental hospital after going postal in Saint Lucie drug store. “Yesterday the Mets' Crack Medical team (MCMT) committed enigmatic pitcher Oliver Perez . . .
April 4 Manuel will start Cora batting 3rd. Blanco to lead off . . .
April 5 Reyes back on IR, diagnosed with broken tibia. Manuel says the star shortstop will be day-to-day. Reyes' injury, originally diagnosed as a hyperactive thyroid . . .
April 20 Manuel, admitting “mistake” removes Cora from three hole. Inserts Castillo . .
May 14 Beltran returns to field. Hits triple and homer.
May 18 Beltran goes on IR, diagnosed by MCMT with “boo-boo”.
June 1 Jason Bay plays ground ball into inside-the-park homer. Catcher Raymond Castro of the White Sox says it's his first. “I thought I'd die rounding 3rd,” he says.
June 15 Reyes' injury re-diagnosed by MCMT: tonsillitis. Symptoms not unlike those of hyperactive thyroid says MCMT.
July 12 Mets trade Dan Murphy for Adrian Gonzalez (40 HR in 09). N.Y. Post blogger claims that Minaya is still based in favor of Latinos. Manuel says the new addition will bat 8th.
August 1 Reyes returns. Celebrates with a triple and two homers.
August 2 Beltran says that his injury (“boo-boo”) may endanger his career.
August 4 Reyes back in IR. Crack Medical team spokesman says: “It's what we thought last spring was a hyperactive thyroid.” New diagnosis: Sniffles.
August 15 Manuel juggles lineup: Cora back in 3-hole.
August 20 Adrian Gonzalez complains of “fatigue”. He is immediately handed over to the Mets' Crack Medical Team.
August 16 Perez attacks ward nurse.
August 20 Reyes back in lineup. Says Mets can still win even though they are 38 games behind the league-leading Phillies.
August 28th Beltran returns. Takes Gonzalez's spot in 8-hole.
September 1 Reyes out again. MCMT diagnoses Alzheimer's.
September 15 Adrian Gonzalez retires at age 29.
September 20 Beltran back on IR with skinned knee.
October 20 Minaya and Manuel get 3-year contract extensions.
March 23 Reyes OKed to play by Mets' Crack Medical Team (MCMT) after bout with hyperactive thyroid.
March 31 Oliver Perez remanded to mental hospital after going postal in Saint Lucie drug store. “Yesterday the Mets' Crack Medical team (MCMT) committed enigmatic pitcher Oliver Perez . . .
April 4 Manuel will start Cora batting 3rd. Blanco to lead off . . .
April 5 Reyes back on IR, diagnosed with broken tibia. Manuel says the star shortstop will be day-to-day. Reyes' injury, originally diagnosed as a hyperactive thyroid . . .
April 20 Manuel, admitting “mistake” removes Cora from three hole. Inserts Castillo . .
May 14 Beltran returns to field. Hits triple and homer.
May 18 Beltran goes on IR, diagnosed by MCMT with “boo-boo”.
June 1 Jason Bay plays ground ball into inside-the-park homer. Catcher Raymond Castro of the White Sox says it's his first. “I thought I'd die rounding 3rd,” he says.
June 15 Reyes' injury re-diagnosed by MCMT: tonsillitis. Symptoms not unlike those of hyperactive thyroid says MCMT.
July 12 Mets trade Dan Murphy for Adrian Gonzalez (40 HR in 09). N.Y. Post blogger claims that Minaya is still based in favor of Latinos. Manuel says the new addition will bat 8th.
August 1 Reyes returns. Celebrates with a triple and two homers.
August 2 Beltran says that his injury (“boo-boo”) may endanger his career.
August 4 Reyes back in IR. Crack Medical team spokesman says: “It's what we thought last spring was a hyperactive thyroid.” New diagnosis: Sniffles.
August 15 Manuel juggles lineup: Cora back in 3-hole.
August 20 Adrian Gonzalez complains of “fatigue”. He is immediately handed over to the Mets' Crack Medical Team.
August 16 Perez attacks ward nurse.
August 20 Reyes back in lineup. Says Mets can still win even though they are 38 games behind the league-leading Phillies.
August 28th Beltran returns. Takes Gonzalez's spot in 8-hole.
September 1 Reyes out again. MCMT diagnoses Alzheimer's.
September 15 Adrian Gonzalez retires at age 29.
September 20 Beltran back on IR with skinned knee.
October 20 Minaya and Manuel get 3-year contract extensions.
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