5 Keys to a Jets Victory Against the Bills - Week 13

Being a Jets fan is like riding on a roller coaster - There are lots of ups and downs but no matter what, you'll eventually feel like you want blow chunks behind the corndog stand. I typically have a gratuitous photo of a hot girl in some type of Jets apparel to go with the 5 Keys feature but I figured that I'd keep it classy this week. Here are the 5 things the Jets have to do to split the season series with the Bills in Week 13.

1) Sione POO-HAH Sione Pouha is the Jets replacement Nose Tackle. Jets fans were teary eyed after learning that the "big beefhouse", Kris Jenkins, busted his knee up for the season in the Week 6 matchup vs. the Bills. Sione is no "large leviathan", but he has served admirably filling in the "round-body run-stopper". Both Bills RB's ran for over 50 yards in the first game and it would be prudent for the Jets to put the onus on Buffalo's passing game in 3rd down situations so they can execute on Key #4. Kris Jenkins is fat by the way.

2) J_E_T_S = Just Eliminate Turnovers Sanchez As Seen on this clever sign. Mark threw for a meager 100 and some-bullshit-amount-of-yards in his first game ever versus the Bills. He also threw 5 interceptions and secured an appointment with the team optometrist to check to see if he is color blind. What I'm trying to say is that he forces passes like I force eye doctor jokes. No big deal. In the win vs. the Panthers last week, he was very conscientious and effectively minimized mistakes. As a result, the Jets won. Not a fuckin coincidence actually.

3) Lean On Cotchery Jericho hasn't been outstanding this year and that's expected when your QB has difficulty deciphering the colors on his own teammates jerseys. Cotch was injured in Week 6 and is capable of being that guy who can get separation and move the chains when the drive calls for a possession receiver to make a play. He had 6 receptions at Buffalo last year and just because they are in Toronto this year shouldn't have an adverse effect. Its only Canada after all, which is basically like America's hat when you think aboot it.

4) Improve on the 22nd ranking That rank refers to what the total sacks conducted by an NFL team. Let's not forget, we're talking about Ryan Fitzpatrick here folks. I give him all all the respect in the world for being able to squeak out wins even though he has about as much talent as an AFL Quarterback. There is NO REASON why the Jets Defense shouldn't punish him over and over again. The Jets should rely on their legitimate DPOY candidate, Darrelle Revis, and former pro bowler Lito Sheppard to cover the Bills WR's one-on-one so the Jets safety's and LB's can blitz and pressure Fitzpatrick.

5) Stick with what worked Thomas Jones epitomizes what a Jets Running Back should be. Tough, hard-nosed, rugged, and whatever other cliche you might be able to think of. He's been the most steady part of the team this year and can always be relied upon to be ready each Sunday. He amassed over 200 rushing yards in the first game vs. the Bills and the Rex Ryan should be looking to exploit the Bills most glaring weakness once again.

Prediction Jets 24 Bills 22

Ok Fine here is a gratuitous Jets Girl Photo. HALL YEAH! POM POMS! GET INTO IT! GET INVOLVED WITH POM POMS! THEY LOOK LIKE FUCKIN FLOWERS AND SHIT! HALL YEAH