What about all of my Islander fan friends? What would they think of me?
Would they consider my fanhood to now be trivial, frivolous and insignificant now that I abandoned a team I once rooted for only to begin supporting their HATED rival?
Am I full of shit?
Will they shake their heads in disapproving disbelief when I cheer a Henrik Glove save or a effortless Gaborik wrist shot that meets the back of the net?
Will I start belting "GO-A GO-AL GO-A GO-AL HEY! HEY! etc" after each score?
Will I ever, dare I say it, scream "Potvin Sucks?"
Well, I can safely say that I won't ever scream Potvin Sucks, as it is retarded and only ensures that the Hall of Fame Defensemen maintains legendary status.
This article is the official declaration that I am switching my NHL Fanhood to the New York Rangers from the New York Islanders. I even put that shit in Bold to show you I'm serious business.
You probably think that this is bullshit. Once you pick a team, then it is your team for LIFE. I usually agree with this axiom, but there is enough substance behind the decision that warrants its validity. I will explain why.
The Islanders are always a 3rd tier team for me. Most followers of my Twitter feed or visitors of the site know that I vehemently support the Knicks, Jets, and Mets. Those are my tier 1 teams and I would never waver my support of those clubs, no matter how pitiful they are. In fact, all 3 are very pitiful and never win anything, ever. I've lived for almost 30 years and none of them have ever won shit, besides the shitty Mets when I was 4 years old. I would love to abandon the Mets, trust me. I'd leave the Mets at a Staten Island Dump and drive away laughing and shooting my pistol in the air if I could. BUT I CAN'T, because I'm in too deep with them. The Syracuse Orange are a tier 2 team and the Islanders are a tier 3 team. Mainly because I was never a huge fan of the sport of Hockey. I'm not from Canada, eh. I'm from Long Island, yo.
I live in New York City. I don't live in Uniondale, Long Island (thank GOD). I've lived in NYC for 6+ years. The Rangers play here, within walking distance from my shit apartment. Even If I wanted to be a Isles fan and watch games, it would be a pain in the ass to take the LIRR and then gypsy cabs to watch poorly played hockey.
The Islanders suck balls. Lets be frank here, the Islanders are not a good hockey team and they haven't been for many years. If you ever want to convince someone to embrace the sport of hockey, don't take them to an Islanders game. They will want to leave halfway through the first period and go to Applebees, which is the worst fuckin restaurant on the planet. They don't pass, they don't skate, they don't have any skills that would excite your average person. They lick balls. Why would I root for a team that isn't exciting or good, EVER?
The Islanders are probably leaving Long Island. Possibly for Brooklyn in 2015, if not a totally different state. So I am going to wait to be dumped? I'm just going to get cheated on and abused before I get abandoned? FUCK THAT. Once I see the warning signs, I'm OUT. I'm getting a head start on finding a new lover team.
The Rangers play puck. If someone is on the fence of embracing hockey or not, you take them to a Rangers game at MSG. Rangers fans are passionate, knowledgeable, and intense. Just like how I am with my other teams. Its a perfect fit. Its not a knock against Isles fans, they support their team too, but I'm not around those fans and can't share the joy misery with them as easily.
I know the players. I've been fortunate enough to interface with a few of the Rangers players. #humblebrag. Go out with them, hang out with them, tell them jokes, whatever. They're certainly not my best friends, but as a lifelong sports fan, having the opportunity to spend time with pro athletes has its perks and is fun. They're not too much different than you or I, really, except that they are athletically gifted and what not. It's one of the interesting things about living in NYC, you can mingle with celebrities and shit. I don't think I'm cool or special because of this. In fact, I didn't even want to add this factor to the article. However, ask yourself this, if you had friends who played for a team, would you root for that team, or hate them? You know the answer.
Decisions made when you are 5 years old shouldn't last for life. Most people pick their teams when they are children. Sometimes they choose the local team (like me). Maybe their parents influence what teams they like. Hell, sometimes they like the Starter Jacket and that's the team they end up supporting. There are so many Bulls fans who still like the Bulls because they jumped on the Michael Jordan bandwagon in the 90's. That's Bullshit, if you ask me. A lot more Bullshit and less legitimate than what I'm doing.
Why should all my teams suck? It has worn me out for years. My teams constantly losing and being all-around embarrassing. Many Mets fans still have the New York Giants. Many Jets fans have the Yankees. Most NY Sports fans have at least ONE team that occasionally wins. Well, guess fuckin' what - I DON'T. My teams ALWAYS suck and I'm goddamn sick of this shit. I need to increase my championship chances so I can for once in my life have my team win a goddamn trophy, goddammit.
Well, that covers most of it. This is a new territory for me so hopefully it's an adjustment that I can make. It's going to take time and it will be a process. Follow my Twitter to get updates on this switch and other quality NY Sports musings.
I wish the Islanders and their fans well. Maybe I was holding you back and all you needed was for me to leave?